Where to Find My Important Papers

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We Had Promised Each Other We Would Never Leave One Another

For 3 years, it was forgetting just little things. He never thought anything about it as his job was very stressful. He had a mandatory work meeting down state which he went to. But he called me on the phone saying that he was lost, and that’s when I knew there was something wrong.

I found him on the side of the road; I had told him to park and stay in his car. We went home and he seemed fine for a while.

The Trouble with Hope

I had a strained relationship with hope before my wife was diagnosed with cancer.  To me, hope was a high waiting for a low, a fix with a nasty flipside.  Far from the precious entity exalted by legions of poets and philosophers, hope was just another coordinate on the pain/pleasure cycle existing in infinite balance with its opposite.  In the same way that happiness alternates with sadness, or desire with loss, hope alternates with fear. One requires that the other exist. Hope was for suckers, and I was no sucker.

簡介 (Grief & Loss - Chinese)





預先制定醫療護理指示及 POLST (Advanced Health Care Directives and POLST - Chinese)


「預先制定醫療護理指示」(AHCD) 是指您指定某人(醫療護理代理人、授權代理人、委託人或代理人)在您不能表達自己意願時為您做決定,也稱為「醫療護理永久授權書」、「自然死亡法案」、「醫生指示」或「生前遺囑」。(生前遺囑在不同地方有稍為不同的定義,請查看您所在州承認的定義。)所有州都承認AHCD,但各州法律不同,因此各有不同的表格。



  • 在您不能表達自己意願時,您指定的人擁有合法權力,可以為您做出醫療護理決定
  • 您可以針對不能表達自己意願的所有情況,制定具體的未來醫療護理書面指示
  • 只要您能做決定,則您自己負責醫療護理決定,除非您另有其他表明
  • 根據法律規定,醫生和您的代理人有義務遵循您的醫療護理指示


Directivas anticipadas de atención médica y POLST (Advance Health Care Directives and POLST)

La Advance Health Care Directive (AHCD, Directiva anticipada de atención médica) le permite designar a una persona (agente de atención médica, apoderado, representante o sustituto) para que tome una decisión por usted en caso de que usted no pueda hablar por sí mismo. También se denomina “Poder notarial perdurable para la atención médica”, “Ley de muerte natural”, “Directiva para médicos” o “Testamento vital”. (El testamento vital es ligeramente diferente; consulte qué se reconoce en su estado).

A once virile, passionate Italian was now void of all emotion

My name is Lisa. I’m a baby boomer and so was my childhood sweetheart. We met at 15, and dated until we were married in 1966, just turning 20 years old. We were born in August, and chose that month to marry as well. A lot of celebrating for two Leos.

Our life began rather simply. Living and working in San Francisco, but wanting to start a family, we decided to buy a home in the burbs.

When Caregiving Ends

Caregiving can last for many years.  Caregivers set their own lives aside to care for someone else.  When that person dies, caregivers have to figure out what to do with their lives now.  There is no preparation for this transition.  Generally you are so busy caregiving, and life changed so long ago, that there has not been time nor energy or even the psychological will to think about what comes next.  Here are some tips that might help you during this time:

Caregiver Self Care: Caring for You

The care you give to yourself is the care you give to your loved one.

  • Learn about the disease your loved on has.  Find out about what is happening now and what will happen in the future with this disease.  The more you know, the more you will be able to plan.
  • Use community resources.  The more you let these services help you, the less you have to do.  There are places to get help:
    • Your local Area Agency on Aging
    • Paratransit
    • Meals on Wheels
    • Day Care Programs

Aflicción y pérdida (Grief and Loss)



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