Long-Distance Caregiving

Caregiving at Home: A Guide to Community Resources

[This new fact sheet replaces Helping Families Make Everyday Care Choices and Community Care Options, 8/11/16]

The diagnosis of a dementing illness or disabling health condition marks a new stage in your life and your family’s life. Important decisions about care arise, along with uncertainty and anxiety. Some choices might need to be made right away. Others lie ahead.

Residential Care Options

Introduction

Background Checking: Resources That Help

Stories fill the news about aides who take advantage of, rather than care for, a parent, spouse, or other family member in their home. Drained savings accounts, missing jewelry, and unexplained bruises are all too common experiences. One way to avoid becoming a victim is to conduct an attendant background check. Background checks include a review of job performance and verification that the information provided to the family caregiver is accurate, and that the attendant can do the job that the caregiver needs to be done.

Talking with Your Parents About Disability

A caregiver called our office recently to say his mother was being discharged from the hospital, was no longer able to live alone, and that he needed to hire an attendant. Stressed out and confused, he didn’t know what to do. We asked him what his finances were, so we could give him an appropriate referral. He said he didn’t know—he had never talked with his mother about money.

Handbook for Long-Distance Caregivers

Whether you live an hour away or across the country, this booklet offers a roadmap for those new to the challenges of caring from afar for ill or elderly loved ones. Included: how to assess your care situation; develop a care team; hold a family meeting; access community organizations and private agencies; and balance work and caregiving. (updated 2014)

Home Away from Home: Relocating Your Parents

As you've watched your parents get older, perhaps you have struggled with situations such as these:

FAQ: "Care" (Long-distance Caregiving)

Dear FCA:

I live in California and my mother, who has just been diagnosed with probable Alzheimer's, lives in New York City. She doesn't want to come and live with me, and I have a job and children and am not free to travel to the East very much. My brother lives in New Jersey, but can't take responsibility for my mother's care. Mom can still live on her own for now, but she needs some help and someone to check up on her. Do you have a suggestion on what I can do 3,000 miles away?

Caregiving FAQs

Have a question you would like to pose to our staff on care issues, use of community services, caregiver programs in your state or other caregiving issues? Just e-mail us at [email protected] with your question and your location and our social workers and resource specialists will respond! You can also visit our Family Care Navigator, State-by-State Help for Family Caregivers, to find resources in your state.

 

Changing Places: Should Your Parents Move in with You?

Lisa's mother, Ruth, has been living alone since her father died five years ago. Ruth has been active at church and eats lunch at the local senior center a couple of times a week. Lisa does the food shopping, takes Ruth to doctors’ appointments, and has her over to her house for dinner, usually once a week.

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