My husband and I care for my grandma, age 94, with dementia. She moved in with us April 2013. I also go to another lady's home for one hour in the morning to get her showered, dressed and fed and for one hour in the evening for physical therapy and to get her into bed in the evening.
Lately grandma is requiring more care and can't be left alone, so my husband stays with her when I have to leave. I sleep on the couch outside grandma's bedroom so I can hear her if she needs help in the night. Some days I am exhausted and some days I feel trapped at home. It is hard to get out and just get my hair done or go to a doctor's appoint for myself, so I go without. But I feel so guilty if I ask for help.
Grandma has four living children who all say they have lives of their own, but at the same time, my husband and I have given up our lives and don't even get to sleep in the same room anymore. We used to love to travel and eat out alot; now nothing.
I love my grandma and it is a blessing to care for her. The family helps me financially, so I dont complain.
I guess if I could change anything I would love a date night once a week and one weekend a month to spend with my husband. Since the family pays me I feel guilty asking for help.