Too Many Appointments – Very Little Care

My husband, daughter, son, and I care for my 87-year-old mom and 89-year-old dad. She has mid-level dementia, cancer survivor, diabetes (to name a few); he’s starting to be affected by dementia, but his diabetes is eating away at his body. Two amputations at the feet, almost lost his index finger, and now we are dealing with more feet issues. Due to finances, we are all living together and my husband, daughter, and I have to work full-time to sustain ourselves. We take turns taking time off to work in their appointments, but it seems that the doctors are taking advantage of our parents.

While they do need medical care and periodical check-ups, we feel like there is no one working with us to manage the situation better. For example, the month of July turned into a marathon with my dad’s health issues, which included surgery to save his index finger/hand. We ended up taking time off to attend to his needs, and I even had to run back and forth from work to do his infusions and wound care. In the midst of that, the PCP called and said my mom HAD to be taken in for her blood work results. I told them that, unless there was something they found that warranted us to take additional time off from work to bring her in, we just couldn’t do it since we still had to take dad to the infectious disease doctor, surgeon, foot specialist, and lab work appointments during the remainder of this month (still July). They kept on insisting that we bring her in so, they accommodated her appointment the same day we brought dad in to them to look at his feet. The PCP took one look at my mom and said, “Your blood work came back fine.”—THAT’S IT! They literally twisted our hands to bring her in for results, knowing that we were running all these other appointments for dad, knowing we have to take time off from work to be their transport, knowing all they have is us! No compassion, no care! The only thing they care about is their financial bottom line. I wonder how much they charged the insurance to give a glance at my mom and tell her “nothing is wrong, see you during the next lab appointment?”

Today I had another discussion with the PCP in regards to my dad—she wants to see him AGAIN this week. She saw him Tuesday, he was sent to the foot specialist Wednesday, and she wants to see him again Thursday for THE SAME THING! I cancelled the appointment and they were not happy! For crying out loud—we’re the ones doing wound care at home and on Tuesday he will be seen by the surgeon. I just can’t deal with these folks and have lost all confidence in most of the medical community